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Getting to “Yes” in a less than rational world
Picture this:
Your employee walks into your office and says with great determination,
“I need a raise.”
You look up, one eyebrow raised.
“I need to buy a house and there’s no way I can make the payment on my current wage.”
You probably felt an immediate visceral reaction to this statement. The flawed argument is immediately obvious to us. Yet, we do this all the time in boardrooms and in our personal lives.
“We need a change order — we overspent and we’re hurting.”
“I need you to stop peeling oranges that way because it annoys me.”
Here are the two flawed premises that the majority of people base their arguments on that is the reason most negotiations fail:
- The other party should care about how I feel — If I describe my suffering in enough detail, they will agree to what I want (hot tip — they care more about how they feel).
- The other party will be convinced purely by facts — If I’m right and I present all the facts, there is no way they won’t agree (hot tip — human beings aren’t always rational).
