I suppose “because I told you to” probably isn’t good enough…

OK, I get it.

You don’t really know me and there are a gajillion writers out on Medium right now wanting your eyeballs.

Maybe you read one of my articles, and you liked it. And the very next day, I wrote something totally different and it made you think, “What is this girl all about?”

Now, this is usually where most writers start talking about themselves (which I’ll get to) but before I ask for any more of your attention, let me tell you what’s in it for you.

My Promise to You

I promise I won’t churn out endless listicles and quoticles (yes…


And easy steps to stop doing it

“I don’t know why this keeps happening. Here, look,” my friend, Mark, proceeds to thrust his phone into my hand.

I read the offending text which Mark had received from the latest girl he was seeing. It read remarkably like the text he had shown me from the last girl. The text ended with, “I’m sorry. I don’t really feel like I’m ready to be in a relationship.”

“Why the hell did they swipe my profile then? It clearly states that I’m looking for a relationship. That’s what her profile said as well. I need your dating whisperer skills. …


No, it doesn’t require years of knowing them or large sums of money.

Two women talking.
Two women talking.

I stopped speaking when I realized someone else was listening. I looked up at his face. He wasn’t creepy at all. In fact, his facial expression displayed a genuine curiosity.

“I’m sorry,” he smiled sheepishly when he realized he had been caught. “But I am really interested in hearing about the rest of your idea.”

“Really?!” I couldn’t hide my surprise. I was in a rock climbing gym explaining the idea behind my first ever article to a friend. Of course, there was a healthy dose of self-doubt peppered in.

Would anyone really want to read my writing? Sure, I…


DEAR MEN

Sometimes it’s them, but mostly it’s probably you.

As I was re-reading the sub-heading of this title, it immediately hit me that it felt judgmental. I could hear the voice of my friend, Ian (who has been friend-zoned his entire life) say, “Maybe I’m just really ugly and nobody wants to date me.”

So, I thought about it. Was he right? Was it something he was doing (and therefore a completely avoidable situation?) or was it simply that he was unattractive (and there was nothing he could change about it)?

Ian’s close relationships consist of a lot of women who love him — just “not that way.” I…


Her research shows that orgasms can even induce mystical experiences the way psychedelics can.

“The biggest misconception about sex is that using sex to feel better is unhealthy” — Dr. Nicole Prause.

At the end of 2020, the global pharmaceutical industry was worth over 1.27 trillion dollars. In June 2021, it was reported that 53% of American adults take prescription drugs. Of these people, 79% say that the cost of prescription medicines is unaffordable.

So, I would say that it’s probably pretty likely that you — my dear reader — are also on prescription medication of some kind. What if someone told you that instead of popping expensive pills that give you nasty side…


But there are ways to create closure for yourself

I changed my mind at least a dozen times. Do I want to see him or do I not? What would I even want him to say? I knew our relationship was over and with the amount of hurt that had built up, there was really no point in seeing him again. What exactly was I hoping for from this meeting that I knew would be painful?

“Is there a scenario where this meeting would make you feel good?” I asked myself.

The answer was no. There was nothing from this meeting that would change the outcome and I knew…


With examples on how to expertly insert them into almost any conversation

Man appearing to converse with a statue of a man.
Man appearing to converse with a statue of a man.

Something that surprises literally everyone I meet is the fact that I used to be painfully shy. The most common response I get when I share this fact about myself is, “But making friends is your superpower!”

What people don’t realize is that this superpower came from years of experimentation — including lots of awkward and uncomfortable encounters. …


One that changed my life and one I’m making to you

When I was 18 and first started going out to clubs with friends and drinking alcohol, my brother made me an offer that taught me a lot about what it means to really show up for someone.

He made me an unconditional offer.

“I don’t care what time it is or how far away you are. If the person driving you has been drinking, you call me. I’ll be there. I promise I won’t ask any questions.”

To this day it reminds me of what unconditional actually means — no judgment, no shame, no strings attached.

Every day, we say…


Sometimes, it’s not about you at all.

It literally felt like we were playing out a Hollywood movie. Carter was the heir to a wealthy family and we had met after a series of wild coincidences. For our first date, he drove for 16 hours to meet me and ended up staying with me for two weeks straight. Yup, you read that right. Our first date lasted for two weeks.

He was gorgeous and passionate. We stayed up all night talking every night. We had amazing sexual chemistry. He poured his heart out to me and told me that he had never been able to share these…

May Pang

Here to help you explore connection — with others and yourself.💙Mailing-list: https://maypang.substack.com/💗email: maeyalily@gmail.com

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store